(I am prepared for mockery if I get this wrong!)
QUARTER-FINALS
APOEL Nicosia v Real Madrid
The mother of all mismatches...APOEL, hailing from the utopia of football that is Cyprus, take on the Champions League's most successful team. On their shock route to the quarter finals, everybody's favourite underdog have mustered a modest 7 goals, averaging 0.88 goals a game. Madrid on the otherhand? 24 goals and an average of 3 a game. As much as I'm sure we'd all love to see the Cyprians conquer Los Blancos, it's safe to say that it's not going to happen.
FORECAST: Madrid win
Benfica v Chelsea
A slightly more intriguing tie than the latter, this game could hold the key to Roberto di Matteo's chances of being named Chelsea's new, full-time manager. Most of the British press seem to see this as a game that favours Di Matteo's side, but I'm not so sure. Chelsea made hard work of their Round of 16 tie with Napoli, and I can't see them being any more efficient against Benfica. The Portuguese outfit are a young, energetic side that possess quality in key areas of the field, particularly in midfield. Oscar Cardozo has four goals in the competition (Didier Drogba is the only Chelsea player who can equal that tally) and Nicolas Gaitain is joint-top of the assists chart. Both sides are, however, relatively leaky at the back, with The Eagles having conceded 7 CL goals and Chelsea 8. With this in mind, I can see this fixture being akin to Chelsea's last European endeavour...unpredictable to the end, with fortune probably favouring John Terry and co.
FORECAST: (narrow) Chelsea win
Marseille v Bayern Munich
This is arguably as much of a mismatch as the APOEL/Madrid tie, though you'd be forgiven for thinking otherwise. Marseille are one of the most reputable names in French football and subsequently their name carries a considerable amount of prestige. However, this current outfit is undeniably poor. At the time of writing, they occupy 9th place in the Ligue 1 table whilst they were also fortuitous to eliminate Inter Milan in the Round of 16, Brandao's dramatic late goal in the second leg securing their progress. I am fairly confident their luck will run out here...they are coming up against a Bayern Munich side that have scored 20 goals in their last four fixtures, conceding only 1. Whilst Didier Deschamps has made Marseille relatively hard to penetrate in the Champions League (they have only conceded 6) they are coming up against a Bayern side high on confidence and with plenty of goals in them, and that should make for a relatively one-sided tie.
FORECAST: (comfortable) Bayern win
A.C. Milan v Barcelona
Milan were exposed by Arsenal in the second leg of their Round of 16 clash as a relatively ordinary side. Having brushed aside the Gunners with ease in the first leg, they laboured to an aggregate victory at the Emirates, shipping three goals on the way. They were so close to blowing their four goal advantage, and that should alert coach Massimiliano Allegri as he attempts to mastermind a victory over the best side in club football. His cause is not helped by the fact that Barcelona are in good shape heading into this clash, having cut Real Madrid's advantage in La Liga to just six points. Milan managed to hold Barcelona to a draw in the Nou Camp earlier on in the Champions League campaign, but it is hard to see them really troubling Pep Guardiola's side. It would take a gargantuan effort in the first leg to give them any chance of progressing, but even then their ropey away form in this years competition (they were held by both BATE and Victoria Plzen) is likely to see them disposed of with ease by Barca's fearsome attack. I can see only one winner.
FORECAST: Barcelona win
SEMI-FINALS
Real Madrid v Bayern Munich
It's here that I'm prepared to put my neck on the block (proverbially) and go against the general consensus and say that Bayern will deny us all the final that we yearn for. And, no, this prediction is not based on the fact that they are German and like to spoil everybody elses fun...well, not solely anyway. Real have breezed through the Champions League this year, barely breaking a sweat as they vanquish all mediocre opposition put in their path. Now, I'm not suggesting that they'll approach this final in a blase manner, because they won't...they're a Jose Mourinho side and will subsequently be well drilled and organised. But I do think that Madrid's players (not management) will be surprised by the quality of their opponents. Bayern's side is littered with quality...in Mario Gomez they have the competitions second deadliest finisher (10 goals) and in Franck Ribery they have a stylish playmaker who has already laid on 4 goals for his teammates. Also, Jupp Heyncke's side will be desperate to contest the Munich final, and their home advantage in the second leg could be the difference maker. With that being said, Bayern are going to have to play out of their skins if they're going to beat this Madrid side...
FORECAST: Bayern win (I think)
Chelsea v Barcelona
Simply put, if Chelsea do navigate their way past Benfica...they won't stick a chance against Barcelona. It will have been a gallant effort from Di Matteo's (or whoever really is in charge at Stamford Bridge) side to get so far despite being so distinctly ordinary, but this will be the end of their European adventure. Over the years, this fixture has provided us with some of the Champions Leagues greatest moments...the dramatic triumph of Jose Mourinho's Chelsea in 2005, the narrow victory by Barcelona in 2009...but I am not hopeful of such euphoria this time around. Simply put, Barcelona should stroll into this years final.
FORECAST: Barcelona win
THE FINAL
Bayern Munich v Barcelona
Call me strange, but this potential final excites me more than one between Barcelona and Madrid does...why you ask? Because the El Classico fixture has become somewhat of a nuisance over recent years...people bill it as the meeting of footballs two supreme sides, and it is, but very rarely does the football reflect this truth. Instead, both teams act like the football equivalent of squabbling children in a playground of thousands...there is play-acting, malicious fouls, fights, complaints from both parents (the managers) and the outcome is always the same...Barca win. Maybe, given the magnitude of the occasion, we would actually get a match that lives up to its hype, but I seriously doubt it. I would much rather see Bayern line up against Barcelona in Allianz Arena, because then at least there would be an air of uncertainty with regards to the final result, albeit a very slight one. But seriously, think about some of the potential duels to be awaited in this clash...
Arjen Robben v Dani Alves
Mario Gomez v Gerard Pique
Franck Ribery v Sergio Busquets
Lionel Messi v Holger Badstuber...
Okay, Barcelona are going to win the Champions League...probably comfortably. But surely you can forgive me for trying to inject some unpredictability into this most predictable of affairs.
FORECAST...
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